overwhelmed

i know it is silly, but i am so overwhelmed and can't figure out my projects! i don't have that many patterns, or even that much fabric for that matter, but i am having a difficult time trying to lay out some projects. 

in the last month or so i have bought some new fabrics (actually i went a little bit crazy on Fabric.com and have lots of new fabric!) and i can't figure out what i want to make out of everything!  some pieces i have a plan for, but others i have an idea, but no pattern chosen. 

*the kitty cat fleece in pink and blue...pj pants for me and Jeff. 

*the grey piece of fleece i made a sweatshirt out of and that is the extra.

*the stack of knits in the back i want to make t-shirts out of.

*the the blue floral knit on the white background my mom just got for me and i *think* i want to make a t-shirt hoodie.

*the teal is extra from a workout top i made

*the light grey i have no idea!

then i have to decide...do i pick a pattern from my stash? one from one of my book? one from Pinterest? or do i get a new one?! oh the choices! 

and that doesn't even count the quilts i want to make and all the OTHER fabric that i have waiting to be made into things. i am just not sure where to begin and am feeling a bit overwhelmed.

i need to stop.

i need to breathe.
i need to take one piece of fabric at a time.

what a life huh? being in turmoil over what to sew first! :)

maybe i will start with my stack of things that need to be mended and remade. that usually gets me going for new projects.

wish me luck!

xo
mandy

springy

it is finally feeling like spring. on my nice long walk today i saw so many little flowers poking out of the ground and lots of little frolicking creatures out and about. the grass is getting greener and the days are getting warmer. i love the spring and all the new possibilities it brings. 

i have been thinking about gardening and what things i want to plant this year. we didn't really do anything last year in the yard, i had just moved in and it wasn't on the top of the list of things to do. but this year, i would like to plant some things. i am thinking definitely some lilacs and tomatoes. anything else will just be a nice bonus. we need to add some stepping stones outside and maybe some solar lights for the front path, but nothing else major. i look forward to going to the plant store and picking out some nice things to go in the yard. :) 

i have been really into smoothies. they are SO good and practically zero calories the way i make them. just a little ice, a little water and lots of fruit! strawberries, bananas, raspberries and blueberries are my favorites right now! if i add nothing else it is zero calories, when i toss in a scoop of chocolate protein powder it adds 100 calories or so. i just made a strawberry smoothie with protein powder and it tasted like a chocolate covered strawberry. SO delicious!

the picture above was from my garden in Round Lake, IL a few years back. i love it because, until i brought up the image on my computer i didn't even notice the little bug on the flower petal, bonus!

xo

mandy

the big chill and starting again...

well today it the coldest it has been in several days...like put your coat back on it is cold outside kind of day. but looking forward it seems the temps will rise again later this week so that is always a good sign that spring hasn't abandoned all hope of happening! i love when the weather starts to warm up and the flowers start to bloom. everything gets green and fresh again. it is very inspiring to renew.

and speaking of fresh and renewing....

i am going to begin April as a clean slate. i am going to start my healthy eating plan (which is really just to say that i am going to watch my portion control and snacking), finally get more walking done (warmer weather means NO EXCUSES!), go down and workout with Jeff (no complaining-just do it), and generally just feel better about me. it has been the season of cover it all up long enough, now is the season of making it all look great before the season of take it all off! :) so i am siting here gearing up to take my walk in this very cold weather knowing that if i bundle up i won't even notice, and in a few days the weather will have warmed again to that i can be out there in my capris and soon my shorts. yay! 

for your viewing pleasure-me! almost ready for my walk. 

xo

mandy

outings and chili

isn't this the truth?! sometimes we just have to believe in ourselves a bit more to see what we can really accomplish. it is difficult to not let others get into your head an make you feel like you can't do something. but if you really put your all into it you will be amazed at what you can do.

we had a really nice day today. i went on a walk in the late morning and fixed a few pairs of Jeff's work pants. no matter how many times i fix them he seems to bust through the knees in his jeans. sometimes i wonder what he is doing at work! :) then we were out for most of the day. a beautiful fifty degree day, no way we were going to waste it being inside. so we went Goodwill Hunting and found some weights and a long sleeved workout top for me. then went to Petco to look at turtles and ferrets. they are both so cute! :) then off to the grocery store to get some much needed food! :) i will be making chili tomorrow! i can't wait. it has been on my crave list :) 

hope everyone had a lovely day and if you were in the area, enjoyed some of the beautiful weather. it is finally starting to feel like spring!

xo

mandy

here and there and back again....

i seem to be pretty bad about keeping up my little blog here. it has become quite a creative space, which i love. but i think i am going to make it more about everything... most of my life revolves around taking care of my love, Jeff, and our kitties. but i think i need a place to just write about everything. so...we shall see if i can make this a place to put down all my thoughts.

as i said, my life revolves mostly around taking care of my boyfriend Jeff and our kitties - Champy, Doggie and Bree. Jeff works as a press foreman at a large printing company. he recently got a promotion and will be receiving his new title in a few months after training is complete. and i am a homemaker that takes care of practically everything at our house. 

a little background on me. i left my job of 17 years as a banker a "touch" over a year ago and moved in with my boyfriend to care for our home, our kitties, and him. i have had some health issues in the past few years and they came to a peak about a year and a half ago. i have been a "fainter" for most of my life. i just pass out randomly for seemingly no reason. but in the last several years it has been happening more and more frequently. what used to be one a year...maybe, has turned into once a week. i saw several different doctors who couldn't really pinpoint the problem. they just put me on a bunch of random medications that didn't really solve the problem, just gave me horrible side effects. my heart rate is naturally high and my blood pressure is naturally low. so my heart rate will spike and my blood pressure plummets and i pass out. well, about a year and a half ago i passed out while driving. thank goodness i ended up on the side of the road with my foot on the break. i didn't hurt myself or anyone else, it was a miracle. but since that moment i stopped driving. and i have no desire to even THINK about driving again until i have stayed "pass-out" free for six months. then, MAYBE i will entertain the thought. when the time came for Jeff and i to move in together he was supportive and insistent that i not worry about having a job. if i need to go somewhere i walk or Jeff drives me. i do lots of shopping online since it is just easier. but the not-driving thing has not been an issue so far. everyone in my life agrees that mandy+driving is not a good idea!

so, that is pretty much my story of becoming a homemaker.  but a typical day for me is still pretty full, despite not driving. Jeff works 3rd shift (he leaves the house at 7:30pm and comes home around 6:00am) monday through friday, so he sleeps most days until about 2:00pm. so from when i wake up to when he wakes up is when i do most of my household chores. i also try to squeeze in a walk (typically 4-5 miles) most days. the evenings consist of dishes, laundry and vacuuming. 

i am hoping to treat this as more of a journal, a daily log of "mandy-things".  i will also try to post at least one picture per post. the picture below is from our trip to Vegas that we just returned from. 

xo

mandy

creativeness

i have been doing some creative things lately. i thought i would post a few of them. enjoy!

quotable

i saw a good quote today and wanted to remember it.

sometimes you have to give up on people. not because you don't care, but because they don't. 

so true.

feeling better today

ok, i have come off "the ledge" so to speak.

i talked to Jeff for a long time yesterday and he made me feel  lot better about feeling like i have to save everyone. he reminded me that everyone is in charge of their OWN destiny. i can say whatever i want and i can do whatever i want but ultimately it is up to the other person.

DUH.

i know this.

but it didn't sink in until yesterday.

and my other feeling...the one that no one is on my side and all of that...well, unfounded. Jeff is always there. he was wonderful. he knew something was wrong and he came to me to talk it out.

i guess sometimes i just need a good talk.

today my dad and brother in law are coming to take all the tools back from the weekend of projects. should be a quiet day today and i am looking forward to spending the day with my Jeff.

oh! and here is my beautiful new porch!

thankfulness and ranting

the power washing is done, and our new stairs are built. i am so thankful for my dad's help with these projects. he is always there to lend a hand with stuff like that. my mom and grandma came along for the ride and spent the afternoon sitting in the shade of our maple tree enjoying pizza and conversation. it was a very nice weekend. 

but...

i came to a conclusion this morning and i need to rant. 

i am everyone's person. everyone. i am the one who lifts people up, keeps them encouraged, makes sure they are feeling ok and happy. it is my unspoken job to inspire everyone. and 99% of the time i do this job happily and with great enthusiasm because i thoroughly enjoy helping people and making people happy. it is something i have loved doing my whole life.  

but i realized this morning that it doesn't really feel like it is anyone's job to inspire me. sure, it is there if i ask for it from various people in my life. but no one seems to be generally worried about my well being. 

don't get me wrong.

i have so much love in my life. i am loved so deeply by my beloved Jeff and so completely by him and our families. 

but, it just feels like no one is "lifting me up" unless i ask for it. and that sucks, because no one wants to ask for inspiration...then you feel like a burden. 

alas...when we have no other job but to be everyone's hero...who's job is it to be the hero's hero? 

POWER! washing :)

today my dad is coming to the house to help us with some projects that need to get done. today starts the power washing of the house, and this weekend he is coming to help us rebuild our back stairs that got crushed by a tree that fell in a storm earlier this year. and my dad is bringing my mom and grandma on the weekend trip, so it will be a busy few days for us! here is hoping everything goes smooth.

                                    

                                    

i hope everyone has a great day!

~mandy~

my first giraffe

i have never painted a giraffe before which is strange since i love them! i thought it would be fun to try. not too shabby for my first try i think. acrylic on canvas board.

baggo boards

my dad made some baggo boards for some of my boyfriends family and i did the design. they asked for the Steelers logo. i think it turned out pretty well. acrylic on wood.

werewolf

so my boyfriend asked if i would paint him a werewolf! i have never done anything like that before, but it turned out pretty well i think. done with acrylic on paper canvas.

watercolor still life

i am trying my hand at painting in watercolor from still life landscapes in my house. below is my first attempt. not  perfect, scale is off...but all and all...not too bad i think!

three simple words

three simple words...

waiting

what seems like

-e t e r n i t y-

to feel them

to hear them

to say them

three simple words...

anticipating

the perfect

moment

held in your arms

cheshire grin in place

eyes locked

three prefect words...

finally

you speak them

and i return

i love you

i love you

i love you

9.1.11

fragile

deeply relaxed

sighs escape my soul

and i melt

into you

feeling

your hands against my

~flesh~

tenderly

you hold me

so close to your heart-

fragile

is my being and soul

be so careful

with me

8.9.11

Untitled

warmth

washes over my skin.

touching me,

your hands trace my every curve

and my nerve endings

scream with

excitement.

i want nothing more

than to lay

in your arms,

my lips

searching for their next

kiss.

lost

in your eyes

for a moment

forever

8.3.11

gone too long...

It has been far too long. I have been venturing into some new creative endeavors, and I am hoping to post some new things soon. Stay tuned...

Untitled

acrylic 2011

Untitled

i remember I told you

i loved you

once

the words caught in the air

and held there

like a plastic bag

caught in the wind

twirling around

mocking me with every turn

but you caught them

and kissed them back to me

and I was whole

11-9-10